Tales from Officer Gould

It has been an amazing time, not just as CEO of thebigword, but as a voluntary member of the NYPD.

So this is my big story of the month.

I was travelling back to the company apartment from our office, sat in a very hot, sticky and crowded subway.

For those of you who don’t know me, I am always carrying a small handbag. This started many years ago when I initially used it for passports and currency etc. but now it is something that I am never without.

My mind, as usual, was swirling with many thoughts and I was just going through the motions of getting from A to B without much consideration. To cut a long story short, when I got off the subway I realised I’d left behind my bag containing cash, iPhone, driving license, credit cards and keys.

I immediately went to the Columbus Station Master and reported the incident. I have to say they were incredibly sympathetic. They told me as they have cameras on the trains there was a good chance they would be able to locate the bag.

Shortly after making a report, a NY police officer arrived on the scene. Again, incredibly sympathetic. After I had apologised for being so careless, he told me that they were not just there to catch criminals but to help the public too.

We were hosting thebigword’s Annual Mid-Summer’s Party that evening at the corporate apartment and it was about 90 minutes from everyone arriving.  I began to panic as I had left my wife, Michele to organise the catering for 40 people and set-up the party.

Fast forward 60 minutes, and to my utter delight, amazement and admiration, the NYPD were able to locate my iPhone because the ‘find my iPhone’ app. I could see it blinking on the map. The map indicated the iPhone had decided to get off the subway and go into a not very salubrious part of the Bronx. Talk about technology, hey!!!

So now this is where the real fun begins. 

The uniformed police I had been sat with explained they had arranged for two police officers to escort me to the Bronx to go and collect my bag.  So I said goodbye to my new friends as they introduced me to two very cool, very macho men, not in uniform i.e. undercover cops.

I know that it is childish but I had to ask them to put the blue and red flashing lights on the car. Unfortunately the lights are reserved for emergencies. Although my bag and belongings are significant to me, I understood that it was not an emergency.

Okay—as we get nearer to the Bronx, I am feeling unconfutable. Why am I with undercover police officers? Why are they deciding to park two blocks away from where my handbag is? So I asked them.  They tell me that the guy who has the bag says there is no money in it and that he will give me the bag but he doesn’t’ t want us to come to the house. They guy is also unaware that the police are escorting me and so for my safety, they are not in uniform; although one was wearing a bulletproof vest.

I am now feeling a little more uneasy and thinking: “to hell with the Prada bag, I don’t care about the cards and the money or my coveted driving license which took me a great deal to obtain—I want to go home!”

I continue the conversation in my head that say: “man-up Larry.” 

My conversation goes on to say: “what do you mean man-up? I carry a handbag!” 

It is evening but it is still bright and sunny.  We arrive in the Bronx but we have parked two blocks from where my handbag has been waiting patiently for me.

As soon as we get out of the police car, I hear someone shout “run, run”. They street is empty.

The police officer tells me to act cool.

Back to the conversation in my head. “Act cool?’ what does that mean?”

So I swagger a little, like I have seen on popular TV shows.

I say to the police officer, “don’t worry I will protect you,” followed by a little nervous giggle.  

I then learn that the guy who has my handbag also has a record for robbery and violence. OMG

I am feeling terrified and running back to the police car didn’t seem an option, so I continued.  

The officer warned me that if the guy asks you for money for returning the bag, it is a federal offence and you don’t have to give him any money. Now here is my dilemma. I would like to, but the money that I have is in the bag which allegedly is now gone. I also didn’t want to be in a situation where the guy asks for money and I am involved in the reason the guy is committing an offence.

We are now in the street and still nobody is there. Suddenly, a door opens on the ground floor and out walks this very fat guy carrying my handbag. I am seconds away from what could be a very unpleasant incident. What can I do?

I grab the macho, cool police officer’s hand and pull him towards the guy with my bag, grab the bag from him and say the following. “What a relief, he is such a bitch when I loose things. (still holding the police officer’s hand) You saved my life, can’t thank you enough”.

I pull the police officer by his hand and we rush away as I continue to thank him.

The macho cool police officer doesn’t look so cool or macho holding my hand. He says in his deep voice; “don’t tell anybody about this.”

So please keep what I am telling you a secret

We then headed back to the city and the party. I felt so cool and excited at the adventure and I enjoyed the startled look of our doorman as I exited the police car with a wave. To which the doorman asked if I was okay. I replied “Yeah, just some work I am doing”. 

After this experience, I am considering a new career!

Next week, I will catch-up with you and tell you all about how thebigword office from downtown to midtown goes.

Have a great weekend.